MOVIE
REVIEWS
Splice
By Joseph McAleer
Catholic News Service
NEW YORK (CNS) -- Splice (Warner Bros.) is an unintentionally amusing and not-very-scary horror film which reminds us, once again, that it's not nice to fool with Mother Nature. Though its message is ambiguous, this perverse tale of genetic engineering run amok ought to win new converts to the Catholic Church's repeated warnings that scientists should not "play God" when it comes to human cloning and procreation.
Clive
(Adrien Brody) and Elsa (Sarah Polley) are partners in life and in the
lab. Genetic engineers at Nucleic Exchange Research and Development (NERD
for short), they specialize in "splicing" together genes from
different animal species to create new life forms. Their pride and joy
are "Fred" and "Ginger," bulbous blobs that may contain
a new protein that will "cure" countless diseases, from Parkinson's
to cancer.
Motivated by greed as a result of their partnership with wicked pharmaceutical
companies, NERD's owners are delighted with these "designer species."
Clive and Elsa are ready for the next step -- human gene splicing -- to
achieve "the medical breakthrough of the century," but NERD
says no, citing the "moral outrage" that would ensue.
Viewers looking for moral clarity on a timely issue will find none in
Splice, which instead waffles. "If God did not want us to explore
his domain, why did he give us the map?" one scientist says. Clive
is conflicted; while he admits "we changed the rules," he declares,
"There are some things you just don't do!"
Elsa agrees that "human cloning is illegal," but adds, speaking
of their proposed creation, "This won't be human, entirely."
She, too, cites "moral considerations," saying, "People
are dying now who we can give hope to."
In fact, a lot of people (including human embryos) die in Splice, thanks
to what happens once Elsa persuades Clive to proceed with the experiment.
The human hybrid result, "H-50," is initially monstrous, resembling
an albino guinea pig on steroids. But soon this creature (which only consumes
Tic Tacs -- not a good sign) morphs into the comely Dren (Delphine Chaneac).
The bride of Frankenstein never looked this good, apart from chicken legs,
retractable wings and a rather deadly tail.
Dren grows up at an accelerated rate, and the inevitable mother-daughter
conflicts ensue, especially when the adolescent Dren, high on hormones,
turns her attentions to Clive.
No wonder Clive's hard heart melts and he is now attracted to Dren --
Elsa used her own genes in Dren's creation. When Clive puts on the swing
music and he and Dren dance their own version of Fred and Ginger, Splice
takes a farcical turn. What follows is outrageous and often obscene, as
the four credited scriptwriters display an unhealthy obsession with human-monster
copulation.
Interestingly, Hollywood films like Splice that deal with genetic engineering
and cloning are, virtually without exception, countercultural. Governments
and, to a large extent, the general public may endorse the advances of
genetic science, but on film the warnings are crystal clear: Don't go
there.
Splice, however, does not wholly condemn the process or method, only the
misguided result.
Directed by Vincenzo Natali (Paris Je t'aime, Cube), Splice borrows freely
from countless horror films, including Frankenstein, Alien and Rosemary's
Baby. When Dren takes to the skies on a murderous rampage, one can only
think of the flying monkeys from The Wizard of Oz.
The film contains a generally sympathetic presentation of human cloning,
genetic engineering, and embryo destruction; nudity; nonmarital sexual
activity; rape; rough language; and bloody scenes of violence and torture.
The Catholic News Service classification is O -- morally offensive. The
Motion Picture Association of America rating is R -- restricted. Under
17 requires accompanying parent or adult guardian.
- - -
McAleer is a guest reviewer for Catholic News Service. More reviews
are available online at www.usccb.org/movies.
ires accompanying parent or adult guardian.
Killers
By Kurt Jensen
Catholic News Service
NEW YORK (CNS) -- Killers (Lionsgate)
is very much the definition of mindless fun, if you enjoy virtually any
of Ashton Kutcher's antics.
Director Robert Luketic and screenwriters Bob DeRosa and Ted Griffin play
explosions, gunfire and car crashes by rote in this lightweight combination
of marital comedy and espionage thriller, which is alternately derived,
borrowed and outright filched from Mr. and Mrs. Smith and many others
of the genre.
If you're not familiar with that film, you'll neither notice nor mind, something the filmmakers evidently are counting on. However, the comic bickering between Kutcher and co-star Katherine Heigl, which is supposed to be the bright shining centre, is mostly stale and insipid. No wisecracking classic, this.
Kutcher plays Spencer Aimes, a glamorous killer for hire used by American
intelligence agencies. He meets Jen Kornfeldt (Heigl), a prim computer
analyst with overprotective parents (Tom Selleck and Catherine O'Hara),
while they're all in Nice, France, and he's on a job.
He and Jen quickly fall in love, he sees a chance to get out of the assassin
trade, and three years later and now married, he runs a contracting firm
in suburban Atlanta, with her parents living nearby. They try to live
a quiet, upscale domestic life surrounded by a panoply of comic hobgoblin
neighbours.
Here comes the twist: Spencer now has a $20 million bounty on his head,
and the neighbours are all embedded assassins, impressively deft with
weaponry and speeding pickup trucks. Shoot-'em-up high jinks, occasionally
comedic, ensue.
The film contains fleeting crass language, mild sexual banter, and all
violence is played for comic effect, making this acceptable for older
adolescents. The Catholic News Service classification is A-II -- adults
and adolescents. The Motion Picture Association of America rating is PG-13
-- parents strongly cautioned. Some material may be inappropriate for
children under 13.
- - -
Jensen is a guest reviewer for Catholic News Service. More reviews
are available online at www.catholicnews.com/movies.
Marmaduke
By Kurt Jensen
Catholic News Service
NEW YORK (CNS) -- Young children might like Marmaduke (Fox), a comedy
based on the adventures of the titular comic-strip Great Dane. Adults,
on the other hand, are likely to find it about as charming as a bucket
of doggie drool.
Director
Tom Dey and screenwriters Tim Rasmussen and Vince Di Meglio unload a slapstick-laden
story with Marmaduke (voiced by Owen Wilson) as a gangly adolescent attempting
to fit in with canine cliques at a dog park that represents high school.
A parallel plot has his human family, the Winslows, making the same transformation
after they move from Kansas to Southern California where the father (Lee
Pace) takes a marketing job for a pet-food company.
Most of the humour derives from the shopworn "he fall down, go boom"
formula, as Marmaduke, with wisecracking cat sidekick Carlos (voice of
George Lopez), navigates the shoals of high school stereotypes: the tough-talking
Bosco (voice of Kiefer Sutherland), the pedigreed collie princess Jezebel
(voice of Stacy Ferguson), and the funky gal mutt Mazie (voice of Emma
Stone) who's just right for him if he'd only notice.
At the same time, Dad Winslow is adjusting to his quirky boss Don Twombly
(William H. Macy), who is desperately trying to sign a national distributor
for his organic pet food.
Since there are only so many ways that dogs can run around, fight and
tear up furniture, Dey has their computer-animated mouths do a lot of
talking. And, oh, do they chatter away. When they're not complaining or
bullying, much of their dialogue consists of stale riffs on lines from
other films.
The one brief evocative moment comes when the animals are mercifully silent.
Marmaduke, beset by considerable troubles of his own making, runs away
on a stormy night. On a lonely street, on a store window TV, he sees the
Disney classic Old Yeller. That tale has impeccable production values,
sincere performances and a non-talking dog that has made audiences burst
into loving, cathartic sobs for generations. Too bad these filmmakers
couldn't take that as their inspiration.
The film contains some mild scatological humour. The Catholic News Service
classification is A-I -- general patronage. The Motion Picture Association
of America rating is PG -- parental guidance suggested. Some material
may not be suitable for children.
Copyright (c) 2010 Catholic News Service/U.S. Conference of Catholic
Bishops
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